With Sri Sri Paramhansa Yogananda as my Spiritual Guru, my life has seen remarkable changes. Each day I get closer to myself and I understand & heal my life even more. The study of esoteric science inspires me. In my life’s quest, I have met some extremely beautiful souls.
Today, as I started writing on Self-acceptance, for the ‘Discovering Me’ series, the memory of a dear friend flashed in my mind and I thought, ‘what better theme can I ask for?’ I couldn’t but share her life story on self-acceptance, the art of accepting your own-self.
My friend lived a happy life with her family. Practising spirituality along with a well- balanced family life. Her life’s priority was her family. She would leave no stone unturned to express her love and care for the family. Her responsibilities towards the family superseded her personal passion and interest. She never admitted her pain. She pushed herself into a corner for the family’s happiness. She suppressed her expectations.
One night, she discovered that her husband was having an affair. The immense pain in the heart choked her, palpitations felt like a racing bullet train and her face turned pale. “My marriage failed!” this thought devastated her. A two-decade-old marriage was at breaking point – one which she had sincerely nurtured and loved to her full capacity. Her husband never acknowledged her love nor showed any appreciation. With passing time, he started disrespecting her.
Every person has a blend of masculine and feminine energy. For sound living, it is important that these energies are in harmony. After the truth unfurled, my friend was not able to live in a harmonious state of mind. But with great willpower and determination, she refrained from striking back. She got closer to her true self; when she acknowledged & loved her own-self.
From ‘flight mode’, she soon found herself in the ‘fight mode’. Fight, not with people but with life situations and self-acceptance. A determined attitude helped her not to be a victim of self-pity or pity by others.
Her first internal reaction was a feeling of ‘Rejection.’
‘Am I not good?’
‘Did I not do this for us, our marriage & family?’
‘Am I not attractive anymore?’
‘Why did he reject me?’
Disturbing questions played on her mind. She bounced back soon after the traumatic face-off with reality. Unconditional love filled her pail with love & confidence. Soon she realized, “Life is too short to be wasted upon rejection by others, especially the one you love. Life is to live to the fullest and enjoy every bit it offers. I cannot give the ‘Veto power’ to my husband or anybody to control my life and create a turbulence.” That day she set out on the journey of Self-love, Self-awareness & Self-acceptance.
- I love myself & respect myself for who I am & what I do
- Only I can help my own-self to rise up in everything that I do
- I will always follow my heart
- I listen to myself first
- I nurture myself first followed by others.
Tips on How to Accept Myself
- Every morning after bath while dressing stand in front of the mirror and mentally affirm, “I love and accept myself the way I am. I approve of myself.”
- Accepting means taking what we get with grace and an open heart. Self-acceptance is accepting, respecting, loving & nurturing own self the way you are… physically & emotionally.
- Believe in yourself & discover your hidden potential.
- The question you need to ask yourself is, “Do I accept myself the way I am?”
- Never underestimate your potential.
- Don’t give your power to others by waiting for their approval & love.
- Self-love is the plinth of Self-acceptance ‘just the way you are.’
- Never express self-pity or be in a victim mode.
- Beware of your strengths and weakness and use it accordingly to your benefit.
- Self-acceptance means respecting, loving & accepting own self the way you are. While awareness is half the battle; acceptance is the other half.
“Persistence with patience; Willingness to face reality helps Self-acceptance.”